1. If you pay attention to me on Twitter or Instagram, you regularly see or hear about Gabe’s antics. He’s both incredibly sweet (telling me how much he loves me, unprompted; rubbing my back and getting me a blanket and generally just being wonderful) and incredibly…three. What do I mean by that? Sobbing because we didn’t get the right cup for his milk. Sobbing because we didn’t put the cup in the right place on the table. He can be a little ticking time bomb, just waiting to explode when you least expect it. Last night, after a particularly frustrating time, I told Mike, ‘I feel like I’m living with a feral animal!” And I do. But then that feral animal gave me kisses before I even got out of bed and said, “I love you so so so so much, Mama!”
And my heart softens again.
2. I promise I’m done talking about miscarriage (I HOPE), but I just wanted to share that telling someone, “Most people wouldn’t have known they were pregnant by now!” is not consoling when they are having a miscarriage at six weeks. AT ALL. Please don’t say that. Ever. To anyone. I keep thinking about how much that bothered me, for some reason. (Plus, I retained tissue and needed a d&c anyway, so it’s a good thing I was in tune with my body and knew I was pregnant. So there.) (I thought I was mostly over it. Sorry. Guess not.)
3. Mike is in the process of getting interviews for his internship year that starts next fall. It will be the final step of his PhD (well, that and the dissertation) and is a year-long position where he’ll be a practicing psychologist in a university counseling center. So far, he has interviews at Berkeley, San Jose, New Hampshire, and Akron (where are now). I have such mixed feelings about it all that I confuse both of us. I mean, living in California would be amazing. Warmer weather, closer to an ocean, a new coast!, more Trader Joes, adventure!. But it’s also so expensive and his stipend will be pretty paltry – we’d have to make 50% more to have the same standard of living (which is pretty darn frugal/simple already) in San jose. And I love having such a fantastic support system here – so much family and friends around us has been wonderful. But I wonder if staying here for his internship would give him the best opportunities later. It may all be a moot point to worry since it’s a match process and we don’t have a ton of control over it all.
4. I let Gabe watch TV regularly (aka: a lot. possibly too much. whatever.) and I found myself wishing today that Netflix offered foreign language cartoons. I heard an ad on NPR for a children’s foreign language program that uses DVDs to help kids learn some foreign language skills. I have lived in two non-English-speaking countries, but find myself woefully pathetic at my foreign language skills. I would love for Gabe to pick up some Spanish before he gets too old to easily learn, but I’m not so into that I’m going to enroll him in an immersion school or get lessons or whatever one does to teach a 3-year-old another language. I want a sort of lazy-woman’s way of teaching him, hence: TEVEE. I know a lot of friends from my international school days who picked up English more easily by watching TV shows in English. (Favorite is my friend whose English teacher showed them Friends in class. How awesome is that??) Get on that, Netflix.
5. I am tired of it being too cold/snowy/dark early to run. Already. I want to join a gym. Well, I want to have access to a treadmill and childcare. I actually hate treadmills, but my body is aching to run regularly. Other exercise works, but there’s just something about running that satisfies me. I could join Mike’s (SUPER awesome) school gym for $10 a month, but then what do I with Gabe when I run? Plus, we share a car which means my opportunity to drive to a gym is limited. Maybe I’ll join that gym and just tell Mike I’m going to run when he comes home from work 2-3 times a week, so watch Gabe byeeee. They also have a pool, which is fun with Gabe in the winter (not so nice to show the world my pale body, but whatever).
Bonus. I shared this on Twitter, but it makes me too happy not to share here, too. We watched Orange is the New Black and grew to love Taystee and Crazy Eyes (well, Suzanne). We enjoyed the show (was a touch too stressful for me, but still looking forward to season two). Such brilliant acting and now: singing! This video is such fun and makes my heart happy. Even if you have no idea who they are or what Orange is the New Black is, watch it and get ready to bop around in your chair:
I don’t want to be the annoying person who tries to solve your problems for you, but you can probably find Spanish-language kids’ programming online via Univision, Telemundo, and PBS. Also, some animated movies (Shrek 2 comes to mind) have a Spanish version that comes on the regular disk. But yes, in general Netflix is woefully lacking non-English stuff, and all their subtitles are in English, so someone who is hard of hearing must be able to read English to follow the movie.
Oh, you’re not annoying! I like problem solvers! Sadly, I’m one of those annoying people who doesn’t actually own a TV, just several computers that double as TVs with Hulu and Netflix. Maybe on PBS’s website…
PBS is probably a good way to go. The Telemundo and Univision websites don’t have much in the way of kids’ shows after all, but I know I’ve seen PBS in Spanish (I have a digital antenna–no cable), so they probably have online versions. Univision has their program “Sabadazo” online, and it’s one of those crazy variety shows. Mostly kid-friendly. Depending on how big your Spanish-speaking community is there, your local library might have Spanish kids’ programs on DVD. Anyway, good luck and good for you for trying to help Gabe be bilingual! It will certainly come in handy if you move to CA.
Not cartoons, but Sesame Street: http://www.plazasesamo.com/
Oh that video is great! :)
haha love Gabe as a feral animal because yeah, i think that sums up most toddlers.
& oh friend, you have as many feelings as you want about miscarriage. i can’t believe someone would say that to you because, really? at any amount of weeks is a miscarriage difficult. i swear some people need a good knock on the head before they decide to speak.
& oh my gosh i love the video!!! so cute!
So many things to say.
#1- Gabe is adorable and I love his 3 year old self even if they are a bit crazy :)
#2- That is an ABSURD comment. ABSURD. First of all, it sucks at any number of weeks because it’s a miscarriage. Also, they are wrong- most people absolutely know they are pregnant at 6 weeks. I didn’t have a period for a year before getting pregnant so I was a little late to the game (because hi, not getting my period didn’t seem weird to me) and I STILL figured it out at about 6 weeks. I would assume most people with periods at all would know by 6 weeks. So there. And also… that is still the stupidest thing to say ever, even if they said it about 4 weeks. It’s still a miscarriage. End rant.
#3- I can’t even imagine how stressful/crazy the matching process is. I hope you end up in NH because that is near me, haha- so selfish… and it’s also like an hour and a half away, but still.
#4- Definitely join a gym :) Is there one you can walk to with childcare as an option? My Y has free childcare and it’s about $40 a month. Lots of discounts for kids swimming lessons too.
If you happen to find something that offers cartoons in German, please share! I totally agree with your lazy approach to the second language. As someone who is devoting a TON of time, energy, and MONEY (blah) to raising a truly bilingual child, I can tell you, it is REALLY HARD. For us, of course, totally worth it, but in a situation like yours where it’s not a necessity like it is for us? Probably not worth the trade-off. But still worth doing whatever you can that DOESN’T cost you a ton. I hope you find some good options!
Oh, the threes. I am so scared of it right now. We are a month shy of turning three and it’s omg, so explosive. I love your description of it, because it’s spot on!
Thank you for sharing that video. I can’t wait to Orange is the New Black comes out with their new season.
Spanish cartoons are very hard to come by. I haven’t found any that really keep my interest let alone my bilingual son. Have you tried looking for DVD’s at the library?
Does your local library carry Spanish language videos/tapes/books? Or can they request them from another branch?
It would be an inexpensive way to introduce Spanish without the cost! You also may want to check if there are Spanish play groups in your area – language through immersion at that age works well. Good luck!
Three is such a FUN age, isn’t it? Topher can be so sweet one minute and lying on the floor, kicking his legs and screaming at me the next. Usually because I did something completely unreasonable, like tell him he can’t step on his sister’s chest. Sigh.
I’m kinda rooting for New Hampshire. ;)
It’s super expensive up here, but we’re managing to do things pretty frugally still with CSA/Costco blends.
Just know that I’ll be forcing you to hang out with me should you end up in either San Jose or Berkeley. You’ve been warned.
You should check out Youtube. I am sure there are a bunch for children’s cartoons in foreign languages that Gabe could watch.
I can see you guys in a New Hampshire farm house – growing your own food and becoming even more self-sustaining than you are right now. Aside from the lack of family support and cold weather, I think NH should be your top contender! =)