I am gone on a retreat/vacation in the middle of nowhere, Massachusetts. While I’m gone, I’m sharing posts from the archives.
This was originally posted December 11, 2009.
Update: I’m still navigating the whole elusive ‘Life Plan’ thing. I quit my job during maternity leave, worked at Starbucks for three months, then found a part-time flexible job closer to home. I work full-time (though, not full-pay quite yet) on my Little Leaf endeavors. It really is a patchwork sort of life! And who knows what this year will bring…
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In second grade, I was Student of the Month (Have I told you about my people-pleasing complex? It began by being a hardcore Teacher’s Pet.). The Student of the Month gig came with a questionnaire with important second grade questions. Along with sharing that mac and cheese was my favorite food and pink was my favorite color, I revealed I hoped to be a journalist or author.
The end of high school came with an increased emphasis on that Future Question, which I was adept at side-stepping. I was good at the school thing and my lack of Serious Career Plans didn’t worry anyone. Psychology was interesting and I adored children, so I entertained the idea of being a child psychologist. This soon abated when I learned it would take more than four years and realized I couldn’t handle working with emotional traumatized children.
College was four years of confusion about my major. I was going to school to become an elementary school teacher, but ended up changing my major a year before graduating. I decided I’d ideally like to teach high schoolers about social justice, human rights, and service. And take them on service trips.
I noticed during my first job that my favorite part of it was designing fliers and brochures (The adorable children were a close second). My years spent hunched over Adobe design programs for the high school newspaper and yearbook came rushing back.
While I volunteered with AmeriCorps for two years, I dabbled with that whole design thing. I took a class. I took another class. I got fancy design programs. I designed things for my own Etsy shop and website, and then began designing for others. I designed wedding invitations, websites, Etsy shop banners, and note cards.
This summer I got my first job with a salary above poverty wages (!). I’m doing what I dreamed I’d do when I changed my major three years ago. I love my job. I really do. I am overwhelmed at times, but I am so lucky to have a job that is so utterly fabulous. (I have the best job in the school. At the best school ever. Don’t tell anyone.) It is a perfect fit.
“Our life is forever ‘recalculating,’ just like our GPS. We might think we are going in one direction, then we miss a turn and are recalculated to another path.”
I love that image – and the freedom to change our path at any time. We might start out to do one thing, but find ourselves enjoying something else. Instead of feeling like I need to stay committed to one idea of what Grown Up Ashley will do for a living, I can embrace a fluid, changing vision of my future.
Not that I wouldn’t love owning both a pizza shop and donut shop. I was on to something, even as a 5-year-old.
Ashley,
I this was one of my favorite posts! It’s nice to know I’m not the only one who has grown up sidestepping that “What do you want to be when you grow up?” question, and changing your mind through college trying to figure it out. Sometimes knowing other people have found happiness by “recalculating” makes the big mystery seem less intimidating, and the uncertainty more exciting.